There are a number of things that can cause someone to experience incredible pain, and a breakup is one of those things. When someone experiences a breakup, he may feel that his wholeness has come to an end.

It will not matter if they have been with the other person for months or years, since the pain can end them. One may then have gone from feeling on top of the world to feeling like one is at the bottom of the world.

unmounted

However, even if they didn’t feel this way, the way they feel now is likely to be radically different. So one could have a physically strong body, a body covered in muscles, but it will have no effect on how they feel.

So on the outside they will look strong, but feel incredibly weak on the inside. If they don’t have a body like this, they can still feel much weaker than they really look.

a loss of control

Before this point in time, they may have been quite balanced and also found it quite easy to manage their emotions when this was not the case. Now their emotions will be out of control and it might be more or less impossible for them to calm their emotions.

In fact, it might seem that they are all at sea now and there is very little they can do about it. So one of your greatest needs may be to do whatever you can to regain control of your inner world.

One option

What one might end up doing, to experience support, is reach out to their friends. Then it will be perfectly clear that they will not have the need to hide what they feel; they will feel comfortable being vulnerable.

The strength that you currently lack internally will be provided by the people in your life. In the same way that scaffolding will support an unstable building; these people will support your unstable inner world.

Two ways

Since these people can be there for them in this way, it will most likely show that these people also have a good relationship with their own emotions. Then they won’t be emotionally disconnected or believe that there is something wrong with being emotionally vulnerable.

Instinctively, they may also realize that no one is their own island and that there will be times in everyone’s life when they need emotional support. Therefore, if they were not in a good way, they would also reach others in the same way.

The healthy approach

When one is not in a good way and reaches out to others, it will prevent them from disconnecting from how they feel. This will allow them to overcome the pain they are in.

This may take a few months or even longer, but the main thing is that they will allow this process to unfold. After a while, they will most likely gradually start to settle down, giving them a chance to find someone else.

another result

Alternatively, one could end up using their mind to tune out how they feel, and this likely means that they rarely come into contact with their pain. And, even when this pain reaches their awareness, they will soon do what they can to push it back into their body.

This may mean that there is no one in their life that they can open up to, or it could simply show that they are not comfortable approaching others. Either way, this bread will get stuck inside them.

a divided being

What this will do is allow them to settle down without having to work through their emotional pain. The downside of this approach is that it will no longer be possible for you to function as a full human being.

Not only will they lose touch with their ‘bad’ feelings, but they will also lose touch with their ‘good’ feelings. So they can come off as someone who is very flat, and they can even come across as cold.

false highs

Being out of touch with the very things that allow them to feel alive, they may end up being drawn to things that will artificially bring them to life. This may mean that they will end up being drawn to alcohol, drugs, have endless casual encounters, and/or may constantly travel abroad.

The downside is that the momentary sense of vitality they get from engaging in such things will likely make it even harder for them to handle their normal self. So it’s easy to see why they might become addicted to these things.

Awareness

If someone like that were to get in touch with your pain, you might be too embarrassed to get close to others. Keeping this pain to themselves by disconnecting from it will then have been a way of facing it safely.

With this in mind, it will be essential for one to accept that there is nothing wrong with seeking support. And even if someone else tries to embarrass them, he would just show that this person has their own wounds to work out.

If one can relate to this and wants to change their life, they may need the help of a therapist or healer.